Panic Attack
by Hookeduponthecaptain
Summary: Emma gets a little hesitant waking up next to Killian and has a panic attack. M-rated.


Based on this prompt: How about a morning after prompt... And emma gets a little hesitant waking up next to him but he holds her against him and calms her down. Proceed with smut. Hope this inspires something!

I hope you all like it. I love reviews more than waking up next to Killian Jones.. (ehh yeah, that's not true, but still I love them)

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Emma tried to force away the consciousness that flickered on the edge of her sleep-filled mind. She felt content and warm and she really didn't want to wake up.

She watched Killian as he slept. He looked serene and so much younger. It was an odd thing to see, but she couldn't help but think it was a good look on him. It was nice to see him look so peaceful. His lips were slightly pouting and his arm was firmly holding her close to him, their legs tangled together.

The intimacy of their position overwhelmed her, causing her chest to ache beautifully. She had no clue where she began and where he ended, but she was aware of each inch of their touching bodies. Never in her life she had experienced this feeling and she did her best to just breathe and not panic.

Last night had been amazing, but she wasn't quite sure if she was ready to deal with all of it, if she would be able to let the walls down once and for all. Their bodies were one in every move and every touch and it scared her to death. It was as if they were made for each other and Emma didn't believe in such things. It was getting too serious and that was usually when she ran.

She tried to supress the panic that was building inside of her, but it wasn't working. She was so close of breaking down and she needed to get out of the room. She couldn't let him have her heart because he was just going to leave like everyone else. Emma knew Killian loved her, but would it be enough? Would it be enough for him to want to stay or would he tire of her?

She felt tears welling her eyes as she thought about him leaving. She should have been more careful, she should have kept her distance from him. He had the power to crush her heart in a second and it scared her to death. She tried to hold back her tears, but she couldn't stop the few tears spilling down her cheeks.

She was just about to take refuge in the bathroom, when she heard his voice, "Where are you going, Swan?"

"To the bathroom," she said, her voice trembling. She took a deep breath as she tried to rein in the emotions she was feeling.

Killian quickly got out of bed and walked to Emma, taking her face between his hand and wrist. The concern she saw in his eyes made her heart stutter and her tears to fall freely.

"What is wrong?" Killian asked, wrapping his arms around her, pulling her close to his chest, not even caring that both of them were stark naked. She felt him kiss her forehead, his fingers rubbing circular traces over her back. She could feel he was hesitant, treating her as if she might run away.

"I … -," she started, only to have the words vanish from her mind. She attempted to swallow around the lump that had formed in her throat. How was she supposed to explain this? How was she supposed to say that it was better they went their separate ways so that her heart wouldn't be completely crushed if he decided to leave?

"It's okay, love," he said. "I'm here and I'm not going anywhere until the day you order me away."

She squeezed her eyes shut and relaxed against him, her body melting against his. She should have been surprised that he had understood what she was feeling, without her having to say the words, but she wasn't. He knew her better than anyone else ever had.

"I'm sorry," she murmured. "I'm not good with relationships, Killian. Every time I start to get close to someone they end up leaving me or dying. So whenever I get too close, I do what I do best: I run. I'm broken, Killian and I'm not sure if I'll ever be whole again. I'm just waiting for the other shoe to drop, I'm waiting for the moment you decide that I'm not enough, that I'm not worth it."

Killian frowned slightly before shaking his head, "I'm not going anywhere. You are everything to me. You are my home. I would rather die a thousands deaths before leaving you. I love you, Emma. I want to wake up beside you every morning and fall asleep with you in my arms every night for the rest of my life."

First, she tensed against him. After Neal she stopped believing in love, but she saw the love and devotion in Killian's eyes and almost all the bad memories about love vanished.

Emma smiled a small smile and pulled him to her, brushing her lips lightly against his. There was still a small part of her that was afraid, but she was getting there. She trusted him and she knew he wasn't going to leave her.

Killian kissed her chin before tracing his lips over hers softly. There was no hurry in their movements; they had all the time of the world. His fingers moved up and down her arm and she twisted her fingers in his hair, deepening their kiss.

The length of their bodies pressed against each other. Killian pushed Emma back onto the bed. He traced his fingers from her neck, between her breasts, to her nipple. Emma's eyes closed in pleasure as he let his thumb trace back and forth over her hardened nipple.

"You're so beautiful," he said as he rocked his hips against hers, causing them both moan out loud. He continued his path, tracing his tongue and fingers down to her navel, making the muscles of her stomach tense.

"I need you," Emma whispered. "I need you, Killian."

He smiled up at her before pushing her legs apart, leaving her exposed to him. He lifted a leg over his shoulder and started pressing kisses along her thigh. Emma bit her bottom lip, trying to stay quiet, but it was in vain. He traced the tip of his tongue against her clit, slowly circling, but not fully giving her what she wanted.

Emma whimpered softly as he starting tasting her in long strokes, before adding his fingers to the mix. Lifting his eyes, he could see how much she was enjoying this: her mouth open, eyes closed, lost in the pleasure she was feeling. Her body arched and tightened around his fingers.

She gasped as he took her clit between his lips and hummed, causing her to feel the vibrations of his voice.

"Please," she pleaded.

He licked and sucked, relishing the way she tasted, while adding another finger, until she cried out.

He licked his lips before kissing his way up her body. Gripping his hair she pulled him to her, kissing him deeply. Their lips moved together, as her hands moved down his chest, before grasping his cock, making Killian groan. He clenched his jaw as she placed the head against her entrance.

Killian rested his forehead against hers before he finally pushed deep inside of her. They stayed like this for a moment, relishing the feel of one another, holding each other tight.

"Killian," Emma quietly moaned, her chest tightening with the emotion she felt for him.

"I'm here, Emma. I'm not going anywhere," he reassured her and tightened his hold.

He began to move in and out of her. Their bodies moved together, skin sliding against skin. Emma met him trust by trust, her legs wrapping around his legs, pulling him deeper.

"Oh fuck," Emma moaned. She was getting close, her cries becoming louder and louder. She threw her head back as her climax neared, lifting her arm to pull him down into a kiss. He brought his hand to cup her face, deepening the kiss.

The emotion gripping Emma's chest was so powerful that it took her breath away. She was falling so deeply in love with him. She cried out, her body falling apart. Killian trusted a few more times before his own climax ripped through him.

They stayed like that for a few moments before Killian rolled to his side, sliding his arm around Emma, pulling her close.

She couldn't believe she had doubted him. She trusted him with her life and she also trusted him with her heart. Her heart was his and his heart was hers.

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I hope you liked it! Sorry if there are any mistakes.


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